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The most powerful altered reality for best Creativity

Posted: Mon Jul 08, 2013 2:04 pm
by USMactive
There is a video by a guy you may know, that goes by the name of Richard Bandler. He's out to make money from people by basically making people realize that the world we live in is only a description of what we have yet to discover. Nothing to profound, but he's a hypnotist and I like him because his suggestions are airtight.

He used to a musician. He has a video of 5 differnt hypnosis sessions ranging from smoking habit to motivation. The one that interests me most and what I use myself from the multiple layer upon layer of suggestions that all make being creative seem the most simple thing on the planet. And the more I hear about creativity, the more creative I seem to become. "We are all born artists." said a great painter (*beep* forgot to get that guys name on the penut butter thread as promised. Sorry if it is you reading this, I'll repeat that imagination of running through being on the front page of the forum and the thought of easy spread is instantly fired off. I did it a few times so that now when I think of the front page as an image, of not so photographic detail, unless you're sight is a bit off then you got enough information to think it was the real thing, but then you would have to see my internal image and compare it to yours. My blue may be slightly lighter than your blue, and not through distortion memory necessarily but we have no way to accurately measure how a fully functioning sense is seeing closer to what reality is really like, if indeed the outside world exists at all, we only have five senses and what we experience is the best guess in the moment. And even that could be coming from those computer simulations. I honestly asked my user who had created me for this world in Sims kind of land to delete my file, I'd had enough. But that's because I like my ideas a lot more than many others. There are some people worth learning from and others best avoided, find any positive from the horror show that the meeting seemed to be and notice that the clown is painted in a really shiny gloss that is part of the glowing beauty that I, the beholder have taken as I make my way back to such geniuses as Sir Ken Robinson and his rather entertaining and enlightening at the same time in his talks such as for TED.

TED, is a wonder, or new ways of thinking that maybe just a single sentance from a 20 minute speech will keep coming to mind, until I realize there is something important here. As I did the other day and found what I enjoy most in life. What brings me to life, out of my anti psychotic doped stupor and fully alive and driven. But as long as I take the very first step in the direction then inertia makes it all work as planned.) At times, I grimmace with almost disgust at taken any step when the most important thing used to be my comfort zone. But now I know that taking that step leads to another comfort zone, an activity that I enjoy, and daily affirmations that I now notice myself saying almost without my knownlege under by breath to start every day is that "no matter (all bases covered) I'm going to find fun and joy in increasing and ever growing into overflowing abundance of happiness, action that I enjoy as much as a daydream looking out the school window at a scene that is of my own creation, if more auto pilot than jumping in the seat of the bus and taking the passengers to funland, no matter how much they scream and yell and cry that they want their mommies, because fun land is what fun is to you. People can attach fun to seeing an upside down stamp, or jumping on the furniture when they are 40 years old, playing air guitar, sports, painting, drawing, listening and creating music. Whatever it is, fun land provides for all needs, no matter the price, or time and effort, if it's fun then do it and as a hypnotist of simply asking if you are able to wander in your mind and wonder what is the most fun thing you have ever exprienced in your life and if you only did it once, then do you think you are missing out in some way? I had a one time experience on a sail boat where I had to change the foresail. The captain, who was a bit of a *beep* if you don't mind such vulger terms but basically he got pissed off at everyone about everthing, one foot out of place and you where wrong, and how dare you even exist when others are far more worthy, I''m kind of using poetic licence but it does mirror the guy rather well. So there I was at the pointy end, getting stuck in, hungover which in those days was fairly normal, and the captain made sure that the boat plunged as deep into the oncoming waves as he could get so I ended up at points almost under the sea, and once I'd got it sorted and had several dips that soaked me to the bone I walked back feeling an immense euphoria of having such a waking fully alert and alive moment that I treasure as one of the best days of my life. The buzz was so good that I never thought of my hangover at any future point. And yet, when I think of being a self starter and making such an experience be more of the normal way of life by joining an getting fully immersed into a sailing club, there is the fear. The fear of the unknown. What can stop those who may excel beyond compare but never try because they fear stepping into the unkown that is basically walking into the infiinte possibilities until you find your reality by doing the action. Until then fear will hang around connected with the circular thoughts that come around from time to time. Fear is a good thing, such as if a big lion is running your way then using that fear to realize your a master tree climber that the local tribesmen honour you with the beads of power such that you will repeal all who have cruel intentions. And many people do have cruel intentions, but my thinking is in line with Bandler's. The belief that every action no matter how good or bad has a positive intention driving it. So no matter how many times you say you'll quit the drinking as you know the hangovers are turning into 2 and stretching towards 3 days recovery time required. Why put yourself through a weekly ritual of felling the worst you've ever felt just to act like an idiot and forget most of the night and end up with an empty wallet and about 22p in copper in your pocket. Well that was my life for a number of years and I'd probably be sober today if it wasn't for the free market internet variety of wonders that are sometimes a hit and more often a miss, but things like mephedrone, actually on my first ever dosage, after being sober of any chemical for years, it was like that sailing moment of euphoria. I read Stephen Hawking's Brief History of Time from cover to cover totally fuelled on this stuff. Before in my sober state is hurt my head to read and I struggled to understand what was going on. Now it was so clear, mostly through the sheer enjoyment of reading that I thought very mistakenly was the source of fuel to get me through a pile of books that had been sitting, with all the carbon atoms not really moving all that much and the pages becoming rather musty. So I read a book about the entire history of physics from Newton to the day of printing. Then I was onto another, a much more complex book and there was the problem, I had missed many hours of sleep almost every night for many days, and now my mind, no matter how awake I felt, the cogs began to slowly but surely slow until I found myself staring at the page I have not since gone beyond these few years on, at a complex geometric shape, or was it, it circles that had repeating patterns that as they got closer to the outer edge they would get smaller and smaller, eventually, the idea was that they never ever met the edge as each time they closed in they shrunk in size and would go on into inifinity getting ever closer but never meeting. It think it had a name for the kind of geometory that I was previously unaware of. And why did I start reading quantum physics? because it made Einstein's shrinking and stretching of time and space such that the speed of light remained the same no matter where you are in relation to a photon and the speed you are going. Quantum physics was like Einstein and his mind experiments fuelled to the gunnel's with shrooms of great quality and perfect picking timing that now crazy town had arrived and I could let my crazy mix with this crazy. All because a psychiatrist told me I excelled in the maths on an IQ test and should do that. I attempted an OU course but the only time managed more than 10 minutes of effort was the 5 hours non stop novel stimulant no longer available due to high risk of death. It raised the heart beat but I could power, with a clear headedness, through a mountain of maths on this stuff. Then I got my palm/face recollection of thinking that my only hope of getting through to the end was to do it all high. But misuse and lost days and at times almost into the 4th night of being awake while still feeling fully compessmentus if slightly battered phsically, the eventual twitches got so out of control that even a tourettes sufferer would have found it hard going. But this was simply a sign that a line in the sand was drawn and from then on soberiety and eventualy sleep was my only cetainty for I dare not be tortured so out of control every 1.5 second, on the dot, twitch, neck twist cough or blurting an expletive for 12 hours before any sign of it's abatment. These guys can entertain with some of the stuff they shout out, but they are just as worthy of compassion as any other suffering being of another terrible disease. I believe they use anti psychotic medication to contorl it, but like me, it slows them down and they don't like being that way, but for the time being, I'm slowly running out of supplies and that is the line I've made so deep that it can be seen from the moon, unlike the Great crumbling Wall of China which can't, but most people are aware of this rumour now being myth. My eyes, told me instantly that there are moterways all over the UK that are wider than this wall, and man are lit up and still can't be seen from the moon. The older I get more seeing truth, much of which comes from Bandler's teachings and his work with schizophenics. It is very often the case that such people are drawn towards mind altering substances, because there is a kind of magic to be found in more experiences, yet, they all are created by the human CNS and brain chemistry in just the right dosages, that the chemical opens up to the user. And this was and is something I have experienced, but the effort involved to reach just shy of an ecstasy peak through natural pathways seemed far too much work for what was eventually a short lived euphoria. Nice, and happy I got their, but I'll come back to it stronger and knowing that each time I do it I gain more skill, making things begin to steadily pick up pace, until eventually I'm walking around town out of my nut on the chemicals that are in my body and nothing else.

And this is where Bandler mentions that many people find creativity through drugs, and his expression sadness at the loss of so much talent due to foriegn bodies that made love with the mind and body that they thought, and I also at one point also thought, that it was the only way. He talks about how some muscicians would create some of their best music in the darkest days of their lives, and one of the guys he was interacting and trancing into spaced out states simply by raising an eybrow at points and shifting the tone of voice to first bond and form trust and then use his own ability to go so deeply into a trance that the other person natuarllly folllowed. The guys been playing hypnotists on many thousands of people for around 40 years or so. He finds asking nicely if they would close their eyes works far more often than the hypnotised who spends twenty mintues repating that your eyelids are getting even heavier. The trick is to notice when the person is going into a trance state and assuring them with pefect timing simply by saying, "that's right" and after a couple more times they drop into space that is so comfotable and relaxing that it would be rude to let anyone take them out and often people really have to be shouted at such is their control in deep relaxation, that they decline the offer and decide that staying is far more fun. Then you have to start getting creative, as Bandler says, people go on about getting into their RH to get creative but the LH has language as a form of expression that is it's own creative source and the more you practice going this way then that, and then putting yourself into many situations of all you have ever experinced, be it in reality, inmoives, indreams, everything is there as information that if you got down into the finest of detail you might be surprised at how capable you are and the vast wealth of resources, that even acting as Brando in the Godfather an hour a day, will, in accordance on how you play him, what resources are now options that you can movie into your everyday life. If it's time to be the Alpha male then Brando is just once version of feeling how much power and control you are capable of when before you had never thought of yourself that way.

So, to get this over with... Bandler makes the guy laugh after he has told him his best music is after a girlfriend leaving or some other down state, as he tells the guy that he'll have to hope that his wife walks out soon or he'll run out of time to make any new music. Often to get these states we unconsciously create the environment that makes for a depressing outcome, just to touch the sky once again. Bandler's apporach is that it works just as well going in the other direction. When filled to brim with joy, bliss, love, energy, enthusiasm, a healthy body through letting your body run out of fuel for 24 hours can heal you better than any medication in the world. The medication is a key to the healing process, you don't need the key when you are a master of going into altered states of reality. So Bandler goes on and on until you can see this guy has sparks coming off him he is so buzzed from being taken into many states of pleausure and rolling them into a big ball and then inflating them. This is what the body does naturally. I described it to someone who is fan of football how sees a win for his team and is happy, but when the team is the local rivals, there is the same happiness, but AMPLIFIED and fare more INTENSE that, after years of trying it Bandler's way I found myself really struggling as he was using visual imageary and doing things too fast when all along it was not his method but my application, which is still rusty but much imporved on the visual side. The day someone asked me, "what does fun feel like?" I instantly felt it. I'd spent years thinking of fun memories and trying alter them so they were bigger and bold and fulll of intense colour as if trying to drive a car for the very first time. When you suffer so many setbacks you start doubting both yourself and/or the system. Which then makes things only that much tougher as our minds remind us of what we believe if we decide to think something that is counter to it, "oh, you can't do that... remember the time you failed.".. Bandler's way of dealing with such blocks and limits that are as he likes to say all in your imagination, so lets find imaginary solutions. He simply repeats the mantra of the great yogi's in American format "shut the f... up.. shut the f... up.." and eventually peace breaks out and the golden silence give you space to do your work as planned. If you end up getting in aruguments with yourself then your an idiot, sorry, but I used to be an idiot. Honestly, who can sit on their own for 5 minutes before raging at some voice that is only a hallucination and they aren't real. So you end up fighting made up battles. I have the Stotts, Davie and Davie Stott, the Stott brothers, If I hear a worry about doing something one way is that I bring forth the Stotts and their voices that have tckeled me many a time, not just for the high pitched part but also the inflections on words that Bob is the master of turning a simple phrase into a moment to laugh (Bandler also suggests, the moment you laugh is the moment you can move forward and find the solution that will get you to where it is you are headed. So if I hear an annoying voice before going on a long car journey, fully sober and always stocked with food, and if food runs out then it's the pefect time to fast, and I love the energy that fasting fuels me with. So a voice to my right and slight ahead of my ear says stressfully, "urgg, lots of traffic hold ups". I know a negative voice because I feel it then work back to what caused the negativeity. I now say the exact same phrase in the same place in my mind but using bobs voice inflections to make the words, no matter how terrible things seem, the tone of voice is what puts the giglgles into the thought, then on the right, I have Vic, appaer and give a speech of how useful it would be to practice one mind experimeint or another so that as well as increasing my skills, I'm also having fun. Some of the other drivers or tearing open their next pack of cigs with the look that if they don't open nice and easily someone will get a smack, and it's just them in the car going nuts about a bit of papar that didn't quite come apart the way it was supposed to. The more you do these things, the less *beep* seems to matter. Some unknown keyed my car, and for a brief moment my mind was almost in pyschpath nailing them to my wall, pullinng out their finger nails one by one, and I stopped, and knew not only was it pointless but it was also pretty nasty and showed a side of me that even the horror's of a world war that so many go on about as if the only vision of the future is certain doom. It's their freedom to express theirselves in those ways, but I remind those who use passive phrases such as if only the bankers would do this or that... .. if only... that's not creating the future but putting out a prayer and in my experience, prayers to find something that will awaken my soul to another level will occur today are of use since the mind then has that thought in the back keeping an eye out while I get on with my day. If nothing occurs of note then I'll review my day, and with such vague langauge I'll find a moment when someone simply smiled and I smiled back, would put more oomph into my faith in human nature. It might have had sinister intent, but I'll never know other than if I accept the delsions that my mind makes up to fill the void.

Here's a great tip. If you find yourself wondering what a persons intenet was by some look they gave you that wasn't that friendly, don't accpet the first idea that comes to mind. Because if you don't tink of more possible reasons then you end up attaching this look with a meaning that you made up using your creativity. Use more of it and think of funny things such as they have a facial implant that wards off the salmon of the dawn in her dreams... even though it's not real enough to be taken serious you have increased your chances that your first guess may have not been fully as it first appeared, maybe they see everyone as the ghost of Peter the plague catcher from 1425, and it is customory for such a facial expresion to be made of importance, and avoid getting the palgue. The more you come up with funny or wacky or outragous and even counter examples that are of a positive and just as likely nature in reality, the more any negativity is diluted until you realize the only person who knows for certain why they made that face is the peron making it. So if you want to know then ask, and do it like your slightly touched so they feel they have to say everything is fine to ensure you dont' go mental and start running around screaming.


There's been an accident.

What went through your mind? every person will attach some kind of meaning to that phrase, the most sane being to find out the exact and most precise and imporant details with "who? where? when? what?" because since these are all missing it's common for delusional people who have studied the workings of the mind according to some particular design that is out to clear away the hallucinations and find the facts. If you want to space people out then be 'artfully vague' "that certain sensation you are aware of is only one of other that you discover elsewhere" It al seems to fit with your reality but that's because you are simply filling in the blanks.. agian.. a digression.. a journey into hypnotic language and how such vagueness can have people go inside usually into a fairly light trance, if such a thing exists, and it does once you give it the meaning that is of most use. If you have to go inside your mind to find a phone number then you are not aware off all the stuff on the outside unless it is a danger to you and through your experience in life, your unconscious will keep an eye out while you are busy inside your mind. You're a million miles away, in your daydreaming cycle that occurs rhythmically and usually, when all is well, the same in each of your daily moments. There is the 2pm yawn, The Thursday routine you've done so many times, it just kicks into action with you having to have big flashing signs telling you all kinds of stuff. If you are absent minded then practice in you imagination about to walk away without your shopping and see yourself jolted and word shopping loudly ringing in your ears. Do this a few times an eventually it becomes a habit. for me, I really have to put more than 10 for it to stick such is my mind focused on flights of fancy or deep depression at the unchanging nature or too slowly evolving mixtures when only, very rarely, is something really far out and stretchered far from anything that's gone before. You could do a poo on a bit of cardboard and if their is something about you that is pure unpredictability in what happens next, they may pay you a million dollars if you sign it for them.

You could drive for miles never noticing anyting in front of you for miles as you ponder some notion that you find of interest, but the moment some maniac flys out of a slip road right in your path, you slam on the brakes. This is why making things you want, worth the initial huff and puff, and to make things simpler you can laugh for a minute to get in a higher mind state. When I did my laughing yoga I would be self conscious even though I was the only person in the room. "What if the neighbours hear constant laughter and they feel bitter towards you because they feel down?" I used to be plagued by "what if's" and the occur in moment when your doing nothing and going nowhere, you are all at sea and only a broken plank of wood to hold onto. This is where the idea that you are not your thoughts, you are the thinker is a good time to jump out of that state, maybe take a step back or lean back further in your chair, or move or just do it in your mind, until you are in the observer position. From this vantage point, you see that what you were lost in was habitual thoughts and now as the observer you are apart from them and able to now think, is there something that needs sorted out or looked after, including yourself? Then if your day is clear then you make a list of choices. The more you think of the more likely you will find one that really floats your QE2 and now you are taking active steps that you used your mind as a thinker to find solutions, I know, I was in the depths of desperation and William Wallace in Braveheart who finds that those he trusted to make his dreams real left him to almost certain slaughter, yet my non awareness of this information that I know is essential in such cases, in fact you should have a list of 100 things you could do and even if you feel like death, then do something badly as is another winner. Why was the guy who drank more than me and stayed out with me till 3am bouncing on his toes, ever time, overtime I feel like hell, he's full of life, And I never asked him what he did when he woke in the morning, maybe the thought that he was still alive was enough of a buzz itself to always be up and ready for anything. Even the weekend bender, he was either putting on a brave face or he had the guts of a tyrannosaurus Rex.

Or, something else, you could think of billion things and not know the answer because he is the only one aware or unaware of the situation. But to make things easier, find your own bounce and you are sitting with the very person who has the answers that no one else knows with total precision what puts the bounce in your booty. So get deeply relaxed in a very quiet and still place to sit or lay down and ask yourself, "what puts fusion boosters into my enthusiasm?" or whatever question fits what you are looking for. The more specific the question the more defined the answer although at times, starting vague and heading towards specific seems to flow a lot easier most of the times, as the vague has vastly more options, Chip away until you find the rocket Action man centenary limited edition in mint condition that is you or anyone else you and only you can decide, because, if your stuck in a loop then your going to be there forever if you don't add more options.

So creativity I find, comes from the states that are not so much of a certain pain or pleasure but from the intensity of the state. Deep love like you've never experienced anything that comes close can be yours if you have that experience, or you can ask you imagination to conjure up a fantasy in which you set a scene where a woman of the beauty you may find lust but when you look into her eyes their is something even more potent. What is it? Look deeper and not just hold her but be at one as your eyes see love and reflect it back so she/ or maybe he, it's all about love and in your mind you can fall in love with anyone real or imagined or a combination, her eyes, her legs, that asssssss, shake that booty.

So in summery to turn the boiling broth of just information into a drop you can see everything in it's reflection that the bubbles of boiling hot broth had implanted seeds. Just suggestions, and hypnosis is only real if you believe it be real, and your taste of either being led, leading yourself, or finding yourself waking up a new person after just a conversation with some guy who was slightly rocking back and forth and his voice seemed in one place and then another and then you awoke. What the hell just happened there, well if you are ill informed then you are unaware of all the many layers that are simply stories inside stories inside your mind playing out in a dream world of enough to entrance your mind. But remember, the deeper you go the more control you have over your state. I would play self hypnosis master as an act and simply be him and the more I played him the more I understood about how to go deeper and deeper. The point at which the chatter is all gone is often my usual place to then carry out a planned suggestion plantation, as with no beliefs of any sort other than the ones you make up as you go along there is no conflict and you can convince yourself of anything. And that deep line in the sand that the moon ponders every night and feels the feminine of the dark and negative, yet intuition of certainty that the line means the only chemicals worth anything are the ones that make up all the experiences you have other than those boosted by such things as 5-HTP which is utilized by the body to build serotonin, but those on anti depressants are urged to avoid, as some combinations can be fatal.

Summary:

Intensity is more important than the name of the state. I would also add, as an idea, not yet trialled, that the state be in line with what are your are seeking solutions. Or maybe the opposite state will be just as good if not better. Let subjectivity be our guide know that the creators of the world as it is today had the powerful states of total and utter self belief, resilience, grit, determination, inner strength, and doing activities you love and bring you to life, as those are the most potent. The Nintendo 64 kid knows what excitement feels like, imagine being any child in any house of your choosing with any family and opening a present that N64 kid was slightly more animated than my ZX Spectrum moment but the love affair with that rubbery keyed that even a hundred times trying to load Match Day and it crashing each time after five minutes of screeching away, you still made it all worth it. xxxx

I hope you don't mind a lot of my information blasts from other directions, I find it kind of cathartic and soothing to let others who think reality is what they experience which is fine if your inner reality is fun place to be, but we all know the map is not the territory, the menu is not the meal. All you have is a description of what you are most sure of. Be sure you'll find the stardust or gold or diamonds or simple peace of mind, just believe it is part of you, act 'as if' you are at peace of mind and the more your reality will alter with each habit of thought and action, beliefs and limits, you work on to make the masterpiece that is you, or do what you want. Wake up, and tell everyone that freedom comes from creating it not standing back and wondering 'if only'. The only time is now and the future is what you decide you want it to be and as the fury of the heavens blast into your chest you either are under attack by forces far beyond your ability to defend yourself, or you take your place, among the gods and show what a person is capable of. If you play your life as if a god, then you will overcome everything and as long as you are fair and just then you will find more and more people finding their inner god.

I like the idea that we are gods. It's just a game. The game called life. And if you look outside for others to make your life the way you want it then your pretty much barking up the wrong Ginko Biloba Nootropic tree. They know nothing of you other than a face and few words. Your family may know you more than you think, but you know everything about you and from that point you have the answers to what brings you alive.

but I'm stating to wobble and stutter and delete as I judge my words as I find myself entering the thoughts. Now I'm the thinker again. Laugh like the Buddha would laugh and you'll find the best laughter you ever brought to the world that is so pure and perfect that eventually you will have Buddha's lack of ego and self image and simply be your true self.

Hunter S Thompson has landed and thankfully he's not eaten in along while so his cells are altered into a far more protective hibernation and increased healing is at work. Soon.. sooon

Re: The most powerful altered reality for best Creativity

Posted: Sun Jul 21, 2013 8:59 am
by USMactive
Creativity is stifled by stress and conflict.

There is a book by Milton Erickson called Your Voice Will Go With Me. He was a medical hypnotist and modelled as one of the greatest ever. In this book he gets his pupils to create new ways from getting from the front door to his office. The idea is that no matter how many times you think you've run out of ideas it's simply that you've yet to realize many of the multiple and bizarre other ways that could go on for infinity if you keep looking with faith.

The moment you say there are no more solutions possible then you are telling your brain. All those new creative ideas you have, don't let them enter my conscious awareness so as to hold up the belief of no more solutions.

A forum I used to frequent until they thought my ideas were far too out there that even David Icke scoffed at the thought of them. What I noticed was that when a funny thread took off like wildfire based on creativity such as Photoshop and other forms of expression, these threads could reach 10 pages in a half hour with so much hilarity. I often found myself being carried along on the fast moving currents to get out my own ideas in the form of creative art. (I'm no artist, just good at Photoshop basics)

So if you ever find yourself stuck for ideas then do some exercise, paint, do some housework, sing, dance, pretend to be a Yeti using the medium of the theatre. As long as you know the ideas are on their way, you can get out of the way of the natural process by having your mind put to other tasks.

And this is where I think creativity and the states most conducive to the highest form of inspirational thought are found often in the most manic or depressive states as well as drug induced.

I choose the manic version and can induce masses of overwhelming pleasurable sensations and emotions and once the first domino is knocked over it could be hours before the entire mind experiment is concluded. Safer than drugs and far more fun that being suicidal. (I'm allowed to say that as I've had many psychotic and suicidal events in my life)

Think of your four most inspirational moments in your life. How a thought burst into being and brought you to life that you had to go with it. Experience each one viscerally so as to fully be in that moment before moving onto the next. A few repeated cycles and you'll have them going with no effort at all. This is the state of inspiration and the more you practice it the more it becomes less of out of the blue moment and more into an almost revolving door of new inspirations. Mediate on inspiration and then suggest that your unconscious mind will continue to keep that inspiration constantly running in the back of your mind. Then using the energy and enthusiasm of the inspirations that take your fancy you can use it to propel into letting new creative ideas flow... and the snowball starts rolling down the mountainside gathering pace and power.

One of my pipe dreams is to be able to interact with the neural cortical pathways of the brain using computer software and be able to take the ULTIMATE SOLUTION MACHINE part of the brain and fire it off just like the inspiration.

I didn't think I was creative until I read Bandler. This guy makes it his mission to smash the brave new world model of Huxley and make us all Alphas. Some say he's just in it for the money and he is because it's his job.

WHAT DOES FUN FEEL LIKE?

That was the question that took my rather vague feelings, sensations and emotions and propelled them into vast bubbling vats of intensity. And with that intensity came a more enthusiastic drive to make things happen.